Correct Procedure
by madmother2
Summary: Richard is determined to follow the correct procedure. This is a pre-emptive fixer-upper for the news regarding Richard in S3. If you have no idea what I'm talking about, you probably don't want to read past chapter one.
1. Chapter 1

Richard Poole was the happiest he could ever remember being as he kissed his way down Camille's naked body, moving his hands in a carefully choreographed counterpoint to his lips. She squirmed and muttered something incoherent in French as he found a particularly sensitive spot. Over the last few days, he had discovered that she often spoke French when aroused. He had suggested that he take some French lessons so that he would understand what she was saying but she had laughed, saying,

'You won't learn those words in lessons.'

None the less, Richard knew that he would now have to learn French. Not making the effort to learn your lover's language when she spoke yours was very impolite. Particularly when your lover had been very understanding about your initial incompetence. Richard was embarrassed to admit it, but his first efforts at lovemaking had been frankly incompetent. Camille had forgiven him and some research on the internet combined with feedback from Camille had dramatically improved matters. Particularly the information on erogenous zones; who would have thought that women's body's were so complicated? Thinking about his research reminded him of a question he'd been meaning to ask so he paused and said,

'Camille, does your mother have multiple orgasms?'

There was a moment of silence then Camille said,

'What?'

'Does your mother have multiple orgasms?'

Richard looked up to find Camille looking at him in stunned disbelief. After a few seconds she said,

'Why would I know the answer to that? And why are you asking, Richard?'

'Well, I was hoping that, you know, eventually, I… I mean, you… might and I wondered if there was a… a genetic component…'

Camille looked at Richard with amused exasperation,

'You have got to stop looking things up on the internet. To answer your question: I don't know and I'm not going to ask and if you want us to carry on making love on a regular basis, never mention my mother during sex again.'

'But I thought you and your mother were close.'

'We are but there are some things that I never want to know about her. How would you feel if I asked you about your father's sexual habits? Perhaps I should ask you how many times a week he likes to have sex?'

Richard shuddered and said,

'That's very disturbing.'

'Exactly.'

Camille waited for a few seconds to make sure that her point had hit home before pulling him back up her body and kissing him passionately. Within minutes, she was writhing beneath him again, all thoughts of parents banished from her mind and Richard was trying to stay focussed as his desire grew exponentially with every moan from Camille. Eventually, he lost the capacity for coherent thought and there was just Camille and him and the passion that they felt for each other.

Later, Richard lay looking at the ceiling as Camille slept soundly beside him, one arm pinning him to the bed. If anyone had asked him a few months ago, he would have said that having someone's arm across his body whilst he was sleeping would be unendurable but because it was Camille's arm, it made him feel happy. As he thought about Camille and how beautiful and intelligent she was, the problem that he'd been pushing away came back and no matter how hard he tried to pretend that it didn't apply, he knew that it did. Sighing, he decided to start the correct procedure first thing in the morning.

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	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

Richard neatly stacked the printout in the exact centre of his desk, put on his jacket and started towards the door, saying,

'I'm going to see the commissioner. Call me if anything comes up.'

'Problem, Chief?' asked Dwayne, curiously.

They all knew that DI Poole was not a fan of Commissioner Patterson, suspecting, quite rightly, that the commissioner had deliberately trapped him on Saint-Marie, so for him to go and see the commissioner voluntarily was odd.

'No,' replied Richard, looking uncomfortable.

He left quickly, keen to get out of the police station before Camille returned. What he was about to do was the only logical course of action but Camille was, well, French and despite being very intelligent just didn't understand the British way of doing things.

Commissioner Patterson looked at DI Poole in surprise, saying,

'Are you sure, Inspector? I thought you and Camille were…'

Completely unsurprised that the commissioner had heard about their relationship (the island was a hotbed of gossip), Richard said,

'Exactly, Sir. That's why I'm applying. Met Office procedure strictly forbids relationships within teams so one of us needs to transfer. Since Camille has family and friends here, logic dictates that it should be me.'

'You know, Inspector, here on Saint-Marie we're more relaxed about things like that. No one will think the worse of you if you stay.'

'And what about Detective Sergeant Borday?'

'I assure you everyone has the greatest respect for Detective Sergeant Borday. No one will think ill of her for starting a relationship with you,' said Commissioner Patterson repressing the thought that a lot of people would probably think that Camille was slightly mad though. He appreciated DI Poole's razor-sharp mind and dogged determination but most women found him pedantic and irritating.

'And if I were to recommend her for promotion, Sir? What would people think then?'

'Well…'

'Precisely. They would say that she'd slept her way to the top. And if a promotion came up and I didn't recommend her, they would say that that proved she was incompetent because even her lover wouldn't recommend her.'

'I would never allow such considerations to affect my decision.'

'I'm sure you wouldn't, Sir, but what about the rest of the promotion board?'

The commissioner grimaced; unfortunately the rest of the promotion board was made up of politicians, dinosaurs and bigots, sometimes combined in one person, for whom the idea of a female detective inspector would be dangerously radical. The slightest whiff of scandal and Camille could kiss her promotion prospects goodbye.

'And does Detective Sergeant Borday agree with your decision?'

'I haven't discussed it with her yet.'

'You came to discuss it with me before discussing it with her?'

'Well, yes, because logically, if you didn't agree, then there would be no need to discuss it with Camille.'

'In my experience, Inspector, logic has very little to do with relationships. Tell me, is there any way that Detective Sergeant Borday might have found out what you were planning?'

'Well, I did leave the application form on my desk but she probably hasn't noticed it.'

Even as he said it, Richard had a sudden horrible vision of Camille casually picking up the top sheet and reading it.

'You don't understand women very well, do you, Inspector?'

'The mind of a woman is a complete mystery to me.'

'Well take it from me, you need to get back to the station immediately.'

'But…'

'Immediately, Inspector.'

Feeling slightly alarmed, Richard allowed the commissioner to usher him out.

When he got back to the police station, Dwayne and Fidel were standing on the veranda looking nervous. Puzzled, Richard said,

'Have you finished the paperwork on the bag snatchers?'

'No, Chief. We'll get back to it in a minute. We're just taking a break,' said Dwayne trying to sound casual.

Fidel nodded and Richard noticed that he was sweating.

'Everything all right, Fidel?'

'I'm fine, Sir.'

'Right. Back to work, then.'

'We'll be right behind you, Chief,' said Dwayne, holding Fidel back as he went to follow Richard into the station.

Dwayne had been impressed by Camille's extensive knowledge of both English and French swear words but had no intention of being an unwelcome witness to the upcoming fight. Besides they'd hear it perfectly well from out here.

Richard walked into the station to find Camille standing in the centre of the room, holding a sheaf of paper in her hand. Her arms were crossed over her chest and her eyes were red and swollen. A quick glance showed that his desk was now empty. With a sinking feeling, Richard said,

'Camille…'

'You know I always thought that the British were supposed to be sticklers for correct etiquette, particularly you.'

'I am. I know it annoys you sometimes but I can't help it.'

'Then why did you choose this particular time to violate it?'

'What?'

'I mean, we see each other every day. Couldn't you at least have had the courage to tell me face-to-face?'

'I'm sorry. Commissioner Patterson said that I should have told you first. I didn't realise that it was important.'

'You didn't realise that the first person you should tell is the person you're breaking up with?'

'What?'

'And why are you breaking up with me? I thought…'

'I'm not,' said Richard urgently.

'What?'

'I'm not breaking up with you. I… I… find our relationship very… satisfactory,' said Richard stiffly.

Outside, on the veranda, Dwayne and Fidel exchanged a look of incredulous horror and Dwayne whispered,

'Please tell me he didn't just say that.'

'I wish I could.'

'I tell you what, Fidel, if the Chief survives this we have got to give him some lessons in romance. My five year-old nephew could do better than that.'

Fidel nodded and Dwayne lapsed into silence again, wondering how such an intelligent man could be so clueless.

Inside the station, Camille was gazing at Richard in complete bewilderment. She often found him hard to understand but this was beyond all of her experience. Swallowing, she said,

'You're not breaking up with me?'

'No.'

'Then what the hell is this?' said Camille waving the application form at him.

'It's an application form for a transfer to Guadeloupe.'

'Yes, Richard, I can see that. Why has it got your name on it?'

'Well, Met Office procedure prohibits officers working together from having a sexual relationship so one of us needs to transfer to another team. Since there isn't another team here, Guadeloupe was the obvious choice.'

'Wait. This is about some stuffy Met Office procedure?'

'I wouldn't necessarily classify it as stuffy, but yes, primarily.'

Camille took a deep breath to try to calm herself but it was too late; the emotional stress of the situation overwhelmed her and she exploded,

'You are without a doubt the most infuriating man I have ever met! We start a relationship and _this_ is your reaction to it! You're so… so _British!_'

Richard stood rooted to the spot as she threw the application form at him, shouted something in French that he suspected was obscene, then stormed out. Richard started to follow her but Dwayne stopped him, saying,

'She needs to be alone for a while and we need to talk to you.'

'Are you sure?'

'Yes, Chief.'

Richard reluctantly allowed Dwayne and Fidel to lead him back inside, looking over his shoulder as he did so.

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	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three

Camille gazed out to sea, letting the sound of the waves soothe her anger. After a few minutes she began to cry. She let the tears flow, knowing that she needed to release all of the pent-up emotions of the morning. At first she had felt sick with pain when she'd found the transfer form on Richard's desk but the tears had quickly been followed by anger that Richard could have been so loving towards her earlier that morning when he'd been planning to dump her. She had spent the time waiting for him pacing and getting more and more upset. She hadn't had many relationships (despite her mother's best efforts) but she'd been in enough that she had been confident that her and Richard's had been going well so his decision to break up with her was bewildering too. He had returned and explained that he wasn't splitting up with her but his stumbling explanation about correct procedures had further infuriated her, even though she knew that it was just the way that Richard was.  
Somehow it was typical of him that he would find a way to destroy his own happiness. Transferring because they were on the same team! There was no way that she was going to allow him to do that. Given that he didn't want to split up with her, she could think of a couple of techniques she could use to persuade him (and they'd be a lot of fun too). And if that didn't work, she was sure that she could persuade Commissioner Patterson to block the transfer. The commissioner was very pleased with their clear up rate since Richard had arrived, which since it was the highest on record was not surprising. Richard was both respected and feared by the criminal population and serious crime was steadily decreasing as the major players all decided to base their operations elsewhere. Saint-Marie was no longer seen as the soft spot it once had been. The thought of Richard trying to transfer and the commissioner 'accidentally losing' the form made her smile and the ache in her heart eased a little. Drying her eyes, she started to formulate all of the arguments against one of them transferring.

Camille was happily considering the pros and cons of different persuasion techniques (did Richard have the fantasy common among police officers of being handcuffed? Or would he prefer to handcuff her?), when she saw Richard slowly walking along the beach towards her. As he got closer she saw that he was carrying his jacket over his arm and wasn't wearing his tie. He looked extremely self-conscious; clearly Dwayne and Fidel had nagged him into it. Richard stopped just before he reached her and said,

'May I join you?'

'Yes.'

He looked anxious and Camille knew that he was scared of being rejected. She smiled slightly and saw some of the tension leave his body. He sat down next to her and stared at the sea with a frown. Camille waited and after a few seconds he said,

'I've just been told off by Fidel.'

'Fidel? Really?'

'Yes. He told me that I should never have gone to the commissioner before talking to you. That all major decisions should be discussed by us first. He was very vehement about it.'

'He's right.'

'I'm sorry, I didn't know.'

Camille paused as she thought about how to reply. He had apologised and he was sincere but he had really hurt her. Sighing she said,

'I was really upset when I saw the completed transfer request.'

'Yes, Dwayne told me. He was impressed by your vocabulary apparently.'

Camille blushed but said,

'Nothing he hadn't heard before, I'm sure. You promise that you'll discuss things with me first?'

'Yes.'

'All right.'

Camille moved closer to Richard and took his hand in hers. Richard's hand tightened around hers and his posture relaxed infinitesimally. They sat in silence for a couple of minutes then Richard said,

'Camille, you left before I could explain properly about the transfer.'

'What is there to explain? There's some stuffy rule book in London somewhere that you still feel obliged to obey even though there's no need.'

'No… well, yes, but that isn't the main reason why I need to transfer.'

'So, what is?'

Camille listened whilst Richard explained his reasoning and felt her heart sink as her brain acknowledged the truth of what he said. She heard him out then said,

'What if I don't want to be promoted?'

'Don't you? I was under the impression that you were quite ambitious.'

'I was but I like working for you. We make a good team. And I like spending time with you.'

'You do? I thought that I was the most infuriating man you'd ever met.'

'You are but you're also intelligent, sexy and really rather sweet.'

Richard looked at Camille as if she'd grown another head and said,

'Are you feeling all right? Here, have a drink of my water.'

Camille accepted the bottle of water from Richard and drank but once she'd quenched her thirst, she said,

'Why do you find it so surprising that I like you?'

'Well, I'm not a very likeable person really. I'm not charming or good-looking and I'm obsessed with order and procedure and I don't know how to say romantic things.'

'I don't need you to say romantic things.'

'Are you sure? Dwayne insisted on giving me a crash course on what to say although some of it didn't seem that romantic to me.'

'Oh?'

'Apparently I'm supposed to compare your eyes to stars though why suggesting that your eyes look like enormous flaming balls of hydrogen is supposed to be a compliment is beyond me.'

'When you phrase it like that, it's not,' said Camille, giggling, 'I think that you're supposed to suggest that my eyes are more beautiful than the stars.'

'Oh I see. That makes a bit more sense though it's still a pointless thing to say.'

'Pointless? Why is it pointless?'

'Well, because it's self-evident of course. Only an idiot would need to point it out.'

Camille smiled softly, feeling her heart melt at Richard's words. She tightened her grip on his hand as he continued grumpily,

'And why are compliments always about your appearance? Yes, you're beautiful but wouldn't you rather be complimented on your intelligence or strength or compassion?'

Camille flushed as warmth ran through her at his words. She would never complain about being beautiful but she did find it frustrating that so many people only saw her beauty and ignored everything else. It was so wonderful to be with a man who saw her as a whole person.

'Yes I would.'

'So why did Dwayne tell me not to tell you that I admire your compassion?'

'I don't think Dwayne understands women very well in some ways.'

Seeing Richard's incredulous stare, Camille continued,

'He's very good at getting women into bed but he can't run away fast enough if they want a relationship, which means that he's never developed a deeper understanding of women. I love Dwayne like a brother but…'

Camille paused, not wanting to be nasty about Dwayne who would be a lovely man if only he could get past his commitment phobia. Luckily Richard seemed to understand, saying,

'Fidel disagreed with him but did say that I should compliment you on appearance as well as your intelligence and so forth.'

Camille thought before saying,

'He's right. Women are conditioned by society to feel insecure about their looks so I would probably worry if you never told me that you liked the way I look.'

Richard carefully filed that under 'vital information' in his mind before replying,

'Right. Well I do.'

'Do what?'

'Like the way you look.'

'Thank you. I like the way you look too.'

'You do?'

Richard looked completely confused and Camille bit back a laugh as she said,

'Yes, I do…particularly when you're naked.'

Richard blushed and looked frantically around, relaxing slightly when he realised that no one was within earshot. Camille put her hand on his chest and continued,

'In fact, I think I'd like to see you naked now.'

'Camille! We're in public…'

Camille stifled his protests with a kiss and after a moment Richard responded, pulling her closer and deepening the kiss. They kissed for several minutes and when Camille pulled back she was delighted to realise that Richard had completely forgotten where he was. He started to undo her blouse, kissing her neck as he did so, but she stopped him saying,

'Let's go to your place. Sex on the beach sounds romantic but you end up with sand in places where it should never be.'

Richard blinked then blushed, horrified that he had started making love to Camille in public. Anyone could have seen them! He started to apologise but Camille shushed him, laughing. She stood and pulled him to his feet and they walked along the beach to his hut.

Once they were inside, Camille pulled him towards her and kissed him and once again, Richard lost track of everything except her.

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	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Four

Catherine Borday looked anxiously at her daughter as Camille came into the bar. Like everyone else, Catherine had heard that Camille and Richard had had an argument. Unlike most people, she didn't think that it was necessarily the end of the relationship. She had been keeping a close maternal eye on Richard and Camille and to her amazement, Richard seemed to be making her daughter happy. Personally, she found Richard intensely annoying at times and couldn't imagine ever having a relationship with such a pedantic man but it seemed to suit Camille. Perhaps that was why her own efforts at matchmaking had failed so dismally; she had been choosing men that she found attractive rather than ones that Camille did. Filing that thought away in the back of her mind in case Richard and Camille's relationship did falter, Catherine carefully catalogued Camille's appearance as she walked over. Camille looked tired but fairly happy and she also had the glow of a satisfied woman. So, they'd made up. Catherine relaxed, saying,

'Bonsoir, Camille.'

'Bonsoir, Maman.'

They hugged and Camille followed Catherine back to the bar.

'Are you hungry?' asked Catherine.

'No, Richard and I just ate.'

'How is Richard?'

Camille smiled at her mother's transparency but didn't call her on it; wasn't that why she had come to see her mother after all?

'He's well…'

'But?'

'But he raised an issue and I don't know what to do about it.'

'Oh?'

Camille checked that none of the bar's patrons were within earshot, then explained the situation. Catherine listened attentively, feeling her respect for Richard increasing as Camille explained. After Camille had finished, Catherine paused to gather her thoughts, then said,

'He is right; you'll never get promoted if you continue your relationship and still work together.'

'I know… but I really like him, Maman.'

'I know you do and he really likes you too.'

'So what should I do?'

'The question is, what do you want more? Richard or promotion?'

'At the moment, Richard. But what if it doesn't work out? None of my other relationships have.'

'Even if it does work out, how will you feel if you get passed over for promotion because you and Richard are lovers?'

Camille grimaced and her mother waited patiently. Eventually, Camille reluctantly said,

'Furious.'

'And resentful?'

'Probably.'

'So, Richard is right; one of you has to transfer.'

'But we've only been together a few days.'

'Yes, that is not long enough…'

'Maman?'

'Leave it with me.'

'Maman, don't interfere.'

'Of course not,' said Catherine unconvincingly.

Camille looked at her mother helplessly, knowing that once she'd decided on a course of action it was impossible to stop her. Seeing Camille's horrified expression, Catherine said,

'Don't worry, I won't stop Richard from transferring.'

Camille relaxed slightly; as long as she kept Richard away from her mother it should be fine.

Two weeks later

Fidel leapt to attention as Commissioner Patterson came into the police station, saying,

'Can I help you, Sir?'

'Is Inspector Poole available?'

'Yes, Sir. He's checking the prisoner; I'll go and fetch him.'

'Thank you, Sergeant.'

Fidel and Richard returned a few seconds later and Commissioner Patterson said,

'Could I have a word with you, Inspector?'

'Yes, Sir.'

'I'm afraid that something rather unfortunate has happened…'

'Really, Sir?'

'I don't know how it happened, Inspector, but when I opened the file on smuggling this morning I found this.'

'This' was Richard's transfer application. Richard listened in mounting indignation as the commissioner continued,

'I will of course conduct a full investigation into how it came to be in the file but unfortunately the application deadline has passed so there's no point sending it in now. I'm sure you understand.'

'I understand completely, Sir,' said Richard, rigid with indignation. He understood all right; the old bugger had done it to him again! Even after he had explained his reasons for transferring.

'Good. Well, I'll leave you to it.'

Commissioner Patterson walked unhurriedly out of the police station enjoying the pleasant glow of having done a favour for a friend; a favour that could then be called in at a later date.

Camille waited until Richard had finished venting (and he was right; the commissioner hadn't even tried not to look pleased with himself) before making a few phone calls. Once Dwayne and Fidel had left for lunch, she went over to Richard's desk and said,

'Don't worry, Richard, there's another vacancy coming up.'

'There is?'

'Yes, Inspector Tomlins is retiring at the end of February. They should be advertising for a replacement very soon.'

Richard smiled and said,

'This time I'll stand over the commissioner until he signs the transfer request and post the damn thing myself.'

'You can't do that!'

'I suppose not but how else am I going to stop him from losing the form again?'

'I'll get my mother to have a word with him.'

'Your mother?'

'Yes, they were at school together and they both sit on the Planning Board.'

'By all means, if you think it would help.'

Even as she agreed to talk to her mother that evening, Camille had a sudden vision of the commissioner's pleased expression and realised that her mother had already been busy. Definitely time to have a discussion with her; having Richard here for another four months was wonderful but if it went on indefinitely then there would be no point Richard moving at all.

Camille's discussion with Catherine was short and to the point and after it an unrepentant Catherine had agreed to make sure that the commissioner signed and posted Richard's next transfer request. Sighing, Camille returned to Richard's beach hut, unable to be angry with her mother since she had given them four months to enjoy themselves before they had to travel to see each other. And she was going to make the most of it.  
Richard was waiting for her on the veranda. Without a word she led him inside and started undoing his clothes, saying as she did so,

'We have four months. I'm not going to waste any of it.'

As she slipped out of her clothes, Richard pulled her to him and kissed her passionately, saying,

'I abhor time wasters.'

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	5. Chapter 5

Epilogue

Richard stood stiffly on the dock, smothering a yawn as he waited for the commissioner to arrive for his official send-off. They had had farewell drinks with Dwayne and Fidel the night before then he and Camille had spent the night making love. He was completely sated and very tired but delighted that he had managed to keep up with Camille. She had been determined to make the most of their last night together and he blushed as remembered how she had teased him, driving him wild with desire.

He looked over to her and marvelled at her effortless beauty; even in shorts and a shirt she looked wonderful. Their eyes met and Richard smiled involuntarily. Camille returned the smile, but only briefly, then turned and gazed out to sea. She accepted the necessity of Richard's transfer but she still hated it.

She had made him pose for photographs 'to keep her warm at night' which had made Richard squirm with a mixture of embarrassment and arousal (which had made Camille laugh wickedly, delighted to have found another one of his kinks). She had then presented him with a flash drive and told him not to watch it until he was alone in his house. Even in his completely sated state, Richard's pulse picked up at the thought of what might be on there.

The heat increased even more and Richard rolled his sleeves up in a futile attempt to cool down. Camille had finally convinced him to buy some lightweight suits but even with the jacket off the heat on the quayside was intolerable.

He was jerked out of his thoughts by Dwayne clearing his throat and saying,

'Chief?'

'What is it, Dwayne?'

'You…um…might want to roll your sleeves down before the commissioner gets here, Sir.'

Richard followed Dwayne's eyes to his wrists and blushed furiously as he realised that the bruises from the handcuffs were clearly visible. Frantically pulling his sleeves down he tried to think of a reasonable explanation,

'I…um…we…'

'No need to explain, Chief. She's an amazing woman.'

'Yes, she is.'

The End

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